Why “Running It Out” Before Bed Doesn’t Work—And What to Do Instead

It’s 7:30pm. Your little one is bouncing off the walls, and you’re thinking, “Maybe they just need to run it out.” You let them sprint around, jump on the bed, or wrestle with the dog in the hope they’ll collapse from exhaustion and drift off to sleep.

But what often happens? They’re more wired. More resistant. More unsettled, and you’re left wondering: Why isn’t this working?

Here’s why: Running off energy doesn’t calm the nervous system—it activates it.

The Nervous System Needs Soothing, Not Speeding Up

When children engage in high-energy play before bed, it sends a message to the brain and body to stay alert and ready. Their sympathetic nervous system (the “fight or flight” system) stays switched on—flooding their little bodies with stimulating chemicals like adrenaline and cortisol.

That means bedtime becomes an uphill battle.

Try "running out their energy" in the afternoons, get them outside into the fresh air moving their bodies, climbing trees and connecting with earth to help them transition into the evening and a more calming and peaceful bedtime routine.

In contrast, calming and regulating activities help children shift into their parasympathetic nervous system the “rest and digest” mode. This is the state they need to be in for deep, restful sleep.

What Does Regulation Look Like?

Regulating activities are ones that:

• Slow the breath

• Relax the body

• Provide a predictable rhythm or pattern

• Offer a sense of safety and connection

Here are a few powerful examples:

🧘 Gentle bedtime yoga stretches (like butterfly, legs up the wall, or child’s pose)

🌬️ Belly breathing with a soft toy rising and falling on their tummy

📖 A calming story or guided visualization

🎶 Soft music or a lullaby

💆‍♀️ Gentle massage or foot rub with lavender oil

Why It Matters for You, Too

When your child winds down calmly, it creates a more peaceful atmosphere for the whole family. You’re not just aiming for them to fall asleep—you’re supporting their emotional regulation, nervous system health, and overall wellbeing.

You’re also modelling something powerful: that rest isn’t something we crash into—it’s something we prepare for

Creating a Calm Bedtime Rhythm

Consider shifting from “get the energy out” to “bring the energy down.” A calming routine might look like:

1. Warm bath

2. Quiet space with low lights

3. Gentle stretches or yoga

4. Storytime or mindfulness

5. Snuggles and soft breathing together

These small rituals tell the body, “You’re safe. You’re loved. It’s time to rest.”

Remember to start small and start slow, new routines and progress takes time, the most important thing is that you do it together, be a healthy role model and create a more restful and calming evening and bedtime for your family

#calmingbedtime #mindfulness #yogaforbedtime #familyyoga #wildflowwellbeing